Friday, May 01, 2009

Mom


It has been a tough couple of months as mom has slipped away from us slowly. I spent the weekend with them before the Tuesday/Wednesday when she passed away. Some of the kids have been sort of playing tag and staying with them since mom had her mild heart attack. We knew it took a lot out of her and knew time was short. In the end though, she went much faster than we all expected. We thought it would be another couple of months at least. We think she had another mild heart attack maybe the week before she passed away. She was noticeably weaker the last weekend I was there. One of my other brothers that was there for the couple of days before me noticed the same thing. I wonder if it happened with the move from the hospital back to the house. No telling.

Though her body was tired, her mind was still there and she was our mom until the end. She also told us that she never really had any pain. That was so nice. She spent her last days at home at the lake with the spring flowers blooming. I hope I can live to 81 myself. The morning she passed I was going over anyway and I was about to leave the house when dad called me. They had called the night before and told us she was losing her battle. It was so fast. I went on over and three of us kids pretty much did all of the arrangements. It really didn't hit me until we were at the wake and I finally got to stop and think about it all. The funeral mass got to me too.

Unfortunately we are not done either. Mom and dad are going to be buried in the Alabama Veterans Memorial Cemetery they are building and it is not done yet. It opens in a few weeks. She was placed in a mausoleum for now, and we will move her when they are ready. I'll be making that trip with her and so will a few of my brothers and dad. She wanted to be buried there with dad, so we felt that was the best short term plan.

Mom beat lung cancer with chemotherapy (not smoking related) a year or so ago, she beat a tumor on her brain about seven months ago with radiation therapy and finally was taken when her heart gave out. She had two children when she met my dad. Both of them were widowed, and my dad had five boys. That is a heck of a lady to take us in as her own. They had my little sister together. That is a great picture of them both at the top of this post. I am happy that I spent lots of time with her in the last few weeks. Knowing I could give her a warm towel or some apple juice or a cup of coffee, giving her comfort and familiar companionship, watching her sleep and tap her foot as if she was listening to music in her dreams are memories I'll treasure. Her smile is something I will take with me everywhere.

"I love you mom."